Love Songs We Never Want to Hear Again (8)

Stevie Wonder, “I Just Called to Say I Love You”

Stevie Wonder has always had a taste for treacle. (All together now: “There’s a ribbon in the sky for our looove…”) But in most cases, his melodic grace and all-around musical genius redeems the schmaltz. Not so this 1984 smash, whose ticky-tacky rhythm track sounds like a Casio keyboard preset. Toss in the unfortunate lyrics, which range from laughably maudlin (“No chocolate covered candy hearts to give away”) to inscrutable (“No Libra sun/No Halloween”).